That wonderful girl across the room has the greatest smile and you would give anything to be able to walk up to her and strike up a conversation, but every time you start to do so, you freeze in your tracks. That little voice in your head starts telling you that you aren’t good enough and that if you walk up to her she’s going to laugh and throw her drink in your face.
Probably most men have experiences this fear of rejection when they approach women at one time or another in their lives. But there is hope.
Have you ever heard that knowledge is power? How about understanding leads to confidence?
I’m here to tell you that a little bit of information about approach anxiety can stop your fear in its tracks.
If you want to conquer approach anxiety, take a look at some realizations that will set you free.
Approach Women Anxiety REALIZATION:
1. Fear and anxiety is most likely a learned response.
In this day and age, most kids are brought up to be a bit wary of people that we don’t know. Some people have thought this might be a survival instinct, but when you look at babies or toddlers, they usually smile at everyone. They may have stages of separation anxiety, but they also love walking up and talking to strangers.
As kids grow older, they are inevitably taught to be careful around strangers. This is really grounded in good intentions, a desire to keep children safe, but the reality is most kids were not born this way.
The realization that approach anxiety is not a biological or evolutionary response can help us to let it go.
2. The reason why you feel this way doesn’t matter a fig.
Who cares why you are afraid. Who cares why you imagine the worst-case scenario in your mind in vivid Technicolor before you walk up to a woman. The fact of the matter is, none of this matters. Who cares?
Don’t waste time on the therapy trap trying to figure out why you are the way you are. IT doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is how you overcome it. An frankly, realizing that your favorite babysitter spoke harshly to you when you were little, breaking your little heart, isn’t going to make a bit of difference in how you overcome approach anxiety as a man.
Instead of looking at your fear and anxiety as having power over you, take away its power by not giving it the time of day.
Laugh at your fears. Take away their power. It has no control over you.
4. Don’t fight it, either.
Along with laughing at your fears, don’t fight them either. When you fight it, you are giving it more power. Instead, look at your anxiety and fear with an attitude of being positive.
For instance, adopt behavior that is the opposite of the way your fear wants you to act. If your fear wants you to hide in a corner, then become a social butterfly and talk to everyone you know.